Sunday, June 24, 2012

in the evenings

Thanks to my little girl, I'm going out pretty much every day, regardless of the heat or humidity. No matter how hot I feel, she doesn't feel it and she just loves going outside every evening. It's been such a refreshing experience to see it from her eyes, the fascination, the exuberance, the absolute joy at the prospect of being outdoors. If we didn't live in such a harsh climate, we would have been able to spend so much more time outside.

Sometimes, I feel that we haven't done her right, but what to do, this is life, jobs dictate where one lives, not quality of life for children. That's not the way we grew up, with gardens at our doorstep, with fruit trees all around, plucking litchis and loquat's and eating them right there, standing under the trees, learning how to ride a bicycle on the long driveway, climbing trees, hunting for cocoons, wading through seasonal monsoon streams and so much more. It was a magical time and place. Safety wasn't an issue like it is now. We could ride our bikes across town without our parents worrying about us.

No matter what I do, there's no way I can match what I can offer my daughter, to the kind of childhood I had. Most times I don't think about it too much, for when I do, I get a deep sense of sadness, of something that I have not done right, but then I realize that maybe I can at least make some magical moments for her, maybe she will remember the little things we do, maybe if I can really do something special, she will think of her childhood, the way I think of mine. As the best.

Heading into the sunset. This area is one of E's favorite spots when we head outside. She takes me to the bench and then orders me to sit.

It's fun to see what people are up to...this girl was wearing Kangoo Jumps, which reduces the amount of strain regular jogging puts on your knees and other joints. We spoke for a was very gracious of her to stop and interrupt her rhythm....and she said that this was the first time she was wearing them. I though balancing on them would be a problem, but she said it was quite easy.

This is E taking off as we get outside. I love her excitement. I love how it rubs off on us, jaded as one becomes with life. I love how she makes me feel.


Once Upon A Tea Time said...

We moved to Muscat when I was 9 and my sister was 2. It was a childhood much like you describe: a typical expat in the Gulf kind of childhood, being driven everywhere and requiring parent supervision for the simplest things. During the summer vacation, we would visit India and do things like ride to the store on a bicycle, visit friends and relatives on our own, eat mangoes sitting on the street outside: all the things that are possible in a small and relatively safe south Indian town. I want to reassure you that your daughter will treasure both experiences. To this day, I look back with happiness on both halves that make me a whole. Whenever you write these Gulf-related posts, it strikes a chord because they are thoughts and conversations that my family and I have had. Believe me, your daughter is enjoying her childhood :)

Shalini said...

Priya, thank you. Really, thank you from the bottom of my heart. It makes me smile to read what you wrote, to believe that she's going to have lovely memories. That I'm not messing up her childhood.

Even though this is my personal blog I don't often write very personal stuff, but I'm so glad I wrote this today.

Once Upon A Tea Time said...

Hi Shalini, I am happy to share my experiences with you:)

Mom with a Dot said...

Once I started voicing the most painful decisions I've had to make as a parent to close bloggers and acquaintances-turning-friends, I've realized, many moms are sailing the same boat. As mothers, we tend to take more than our fair share of blame, for decisions that aren't always in our control. Take a moment to read this at leisure, I think you'll relate to this :);postID=7573979319697748350

Shalini said...

Mom with a Dot, I agree, sharing makes one realize that one is not alone in making those tough decisions. Tell me about the guilt factor....I feel it all the time, that I'm not doing enough.

btw, your link goes to a private page, so cannot be accessed.

Mom with a Dot said...

My bad LOL !! Try this

Shalini said...

Thanks for that!